Loneliness, isolation and rejection are feelings shared by people across the globe. Just because you are physically isolated it does not mean that you will automatically experience these feelings. Being alone can be a beneficial and enjoyable experience if it is a situation you choose to be in. Loneliness, isolation and rejection are feelings of disjoint from others, which can sometimes be damaging. These feelings often lead to people becoming scared of being alone. In this article I discuss how to identify if you have a problem regarding feelings of loneliness and how you can overcome such a problem.
The feelings of loneliness, isolation and rejection are often linked to personal insecurities and poor self esteem rather than physical loneliness. If you feel this is the case with you, then you need to start looking internally at the possible basis of these feelings. Some useful questions to ask yourself include:
- Does being on your own physically mean you are unloved or unwanted?
- Do you feel like a social outcast just because you do not have a partner?
- Do you feel like you need to enter into new relationships quickly even if this means undergoing lots of heartache and pain?
As you can see from the nature of these questions a lot of people move from relationship to relationship because they are looking for an answer to their state of disconnect. They feel that by being in a relationship, even if it is not the right relationship, they are no longer alone. However, this is not a realistic solution to the problem. Below I have outlined six effective ways you can remove this feeling of disconnect from your mind and destroy your fear of loneliness:
1) FIND A PURPOSE IN LIFE:- This should help fill the gap in your heart an make you feel a greater sense of worth.
2) IMMERSE YOURSELF IN A CAUSE:- This will enable you to feel and show both compassion and kindness. By giving yourself to the cause you will feel extremely needed and wanted.
3) ADOPT A PET OR TWO:- Caring for pets will reduce your feelings of loneliness because there is now a living creature out there that depends on you.
4) PICK UP A HOBBY AND PUT PASSION INTO IT:- By doing this you will be too busy to be lonely and you may also meet some people you can connect with.
5) PICK UP A READING HABIT:- Reading will expand your mind and lead your thoughts away from feelings of isolation and rejection.
6) FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF:- Regardless of your physical condition, your financial circumstances or what others say about you, YOU have to start thinking about yourself positively. This will really help you rise above the negative feelings that destroy your sense of belonging.
By implementing the above steps you should restore some of your passion for life. In doing this you will no longer rely on other people for personal happiness. By discovering your own self worth you will instead find motivation from within, and your thoughts and actions will no longer be driven by the fear of loneliness.
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If you have tried the above suggestions and still feel lonely you may want to read Admirable You, a simple guide to building self confidence, believing in yourself and making new friends.
About Tom
Childish, simplictic, complete lack of understanding.
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Tom Reply:
May 13th, 2010 at 11:27 pm
I’m sorry you feel that way Steve but you are entitled to your opinion.
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Thanks for the tips. I find them helpful and encourageing.
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Tom Reply:
December 17th, 2010 at 10:03 pm
Thanks for your comments Mylene. Glad you find them useful.
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These are good ideas..
Also try attending church and participating in church activities.
It’s a very good way to meet and get to know new people.
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Tom Reply:
May 2nd, 2011 at 4:51 pm
Glad you like the article Sam and thanks for your contributions.
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Ever since the end of last year, I have been in a very deep depression. I am growing very far apart from people who were once close to me, I cannot seem to trust anyone, and I am losing sight of things that are important to me. I know it has to sound pretty pathetic, but I always find myself trying to relive last year. It was the best year of my life and out of nowhere, everything started to fall apart and I am very slowly picking up the pieces. I found a new job, which has helped, and I am going out of my way to try and develop new relationships and rid my life of all of my bad relationships with people. But nobody seems to have the time these days, so I constantly feel like there is something missing. I have highly considered leaving home and never speaking with anyone I associate myself with ever again.
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Tom Reply:
July 17th, 2011 at 11:40 am
Hi Ian – There must still be people out there who you have good relationships with. Try to talk with these people about your problems and overcome your trust issues. If they are good friends they will find the time for you.
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I’m the kind of person that tries to break throw life alone.Till now i didn’t felt any problem, but now i think that something is missing.When i talk to people i notice that they have no interest in my person,even if i’m very funny and i speak a lot i think nobody could really like to a friend.I don’t even have a real friend because every time i get close to a person,i don’t feel like it’s my place there so i reject them, I think this is what really loneliness is,i need an advice..
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Tom Reply:
November 19th, 2011 at 6:24 pm
Hey Nipple – Very sad to hear that. Why do you keep rejecting people? In the future try to make an effort with these people and you should be rewarded by gaining some valuable friendships.
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